Thursday, July 31, 2008

July

It has been about a month since I last wrote on this blog, and what a month it's been.

My son, John, and his family came to visit for nine days. He has three kids; two girls, ages six and three, and a baby boy, aged nine-months. Zander! What a great name, and what a great kid. I don't think I've ever seen such a happy baby. We all had a wonderful time, getting to know the kids better, playing, going to the pool and the beach, and all the other fun stuff that goes with kids and Florida.

But, as well as the visit went, it was not without problems. Mainly, I'm having money problems., so we couldn't spoil them quite as much as we would have liked, and we had to cancel the trip to the Disney universe.

I graduated on May 3rd and I've been trying to start a freelance writing business. It is a tough business to get started on a shoestring. I spend hours each day, sending query letters and emails to job listings, but with minimal results. It must be tough for everyone out there, because the competition is fierce.

I originally wanted to go out and get a job outside the home, but Mom and Dad require almost constant care. Rarely a week that goes by where I don't have to take one or the other of them to a doctor's appointment. I also have to do the cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, banking, and on and on. Dad wants me to work at home, and that seems best for them. In fact, if I go to the library or take too long at the grocery store, he calls to check up on me. "Anne, I just wondered if you've abandoned us?" So I've been trying to find telecommute jobs or freelance writing, editing or proofreading jobs. I've had a few, but for very little (or no) money.
Of course, no work means I need some help on my bills. Dad has stepped up and taken on the extra burden, but I know it is freaking him out. Every minute I spend holding his hand and re-assuring him is a minute I could be making some money.

I don't know if anyone gets how hard this is for me. Not to cry in my cocoa, but I really hate not having money. I get depressed when I don't know how I'm going to pay a bill. Moreover, I hate borrowing money. And borrowing from my elderly and dependant parents is the worst of all.

So here is my quandary; I want to cut and run. Don't worry, I'm not talking about abandoning Mom and Dad. But, I want to get out of the house and get a job. This will mean that I have to hire someone to come in each day and feed them, and so on. I will also need a flexible schedule, so that I can take them to doctors' appointments. Or maybe I can work a swing shift and take them to appointments in the mornings. I would have to earn enough to pay someone, so that rules out any low paying jobs. So where does that leave me? I'm too old and fat to be a stripper, so what else pays over $20 per hour and is a swing shift job? Jewel thief?

See, this is why I wanted to be a freelancer; if I could just get the money coming in.
I'll let you know what happens.